Hello everyone, whassup? This topic is for discussing random crack pairings (or just non-canon pairings in general) that you've thought of on Neopets. And yes, that does include the videogames. I think I'll kick it off by posting a few random ones I thought of:

1. GarooxYlana from the Return of Sloth Plot

2. FounderxEmpress from the PSP game, Wand of Wishing

3. ToygerxLucila from Wand of Wishing

4. WerhondxDark Guardian from Wand of Wishing

5. Werelupe KingxIllusen from the Darkest Faerie

6. RobertaxGrayson from the Darkest Faerie

Those are all my favorite crack pairing that I can think of right now... Anyway, feel free to come on in and DISCUSS THEM DARN PAIRIN'S!!!!

Oh yah, meet my little 'split personality', Penelope.

And it's pronounced 'Pen-el-ope', not 'Pen-el-o-pee'. Think of it that way. You call me pee, and I'll get ticked off real fast.

And believe me, you don't want that mech-building, meat-eating black rabbit angry at you. Believe me. I made him mad once. *cringes at the memory* In case you hadn't figured it out already, the bold text is Penelope talking, adn the normal text is me talking. Cheerio!

Finally someone else who thinks up silly crack pairings on Neopets! Here are a few really random ones I made up:

1. KanrikxGarin slash, from the Hannah and the Ice Caves and Curse of Maraqua respectively

2. King AltadorxJerdana, from the Altador plot

3. ValinxMasila, from the Hannah and the Ice Caves plot

4. HobanxIsca, from the Cyodrake's Gaze and Curse of Maraqua respectively.

5. HannahxMasila femslash, from the Hannah and the Ice Caves plot

6. ArminxKayla, from the Hannah and the Ice Caves plot and the Battle for Meridell plot respectively

I don't really know anything about the video games, but GarooxYlana is cool! I think they have quite a bit in common. (Like the fact they're both evil Sloth followers, XD. Though Ylana's just in it for the money.)

YES!! LADIES AND GENTELEMEN, WE HAVE A CRACKPAIRING CREATOOOOOOOOOOR!!!!!! -cheers-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SLASH GET IT AWAY GET IT AWAY!!!! -sobs, then regains composure- Heh, sorry 'bout that, no offense, I'm just kind of a homophobe. ^^' Wow.... Those are some weird, wacky and KICKIN' AWESOME Crackpairings (except for the slash and femslash, but that's just me)!

Oh man, you've got to play the games sometime! In my opinion, Wand of Wishing (the PSP game) was way better than The Darkest Faerie, but there are some people who think otherwise, so... -shrugs-

I know, seriously, they're awesome! I'm planning on writing some GxY onesots, but after my horrendously crappy oneshot (a Neopets fic, no less), Huh?, I'm kind of thinking hard before I enter another one... Anyhoo, here are some random ones I thought of:

1. JeranxPsellia, from the Battle for Meridell Plot

2. MammothxLady Frostbite, from Defenders of Neopia

3. ScarbladexSophix, form the Curse of Maraqua and Return of Sloth, respectively

4. BonjuxCapara, from the Cyodrake's Gaze and Brucey B plots, respectively

5. HeermeedjetxShadow Usul, from just I guess wherever they appear, on site and on video games

6. Mad WhootxLight Guardian, form Wand of Wishing

Congrats! You get a zombiefied duckbill platypus to do your bidding for being the first to reply! ^^

By the way, I tend to answer people's comments and questions in the order they ask them, so keep that in mind if I start being a bit confusing. Ciao!

~Dwarfstar~

Yay!

You know, I'm not a huge fan of slash and femslash either, but I think it's fun to use them for crack pairing because they give the author the ability to pair ANY two random characters together, regardless of gender. The options suddenly become limitless…O_o

I know, I totally need to play the games! But I don't have a PS2 or a PSP. And I'm broke. *pokes family and reminds them that Christmas is coming*

Those are really awesome crackpairings! *ponders the possibilities of Scarblade and Sophix* I bet she'll make him pay her…XD *ponders BonjuxCapara* I bet she'll Cheat! on him. *is killed by an angry mob for the bad jokes* How about:

1. Commander GormosxLinae, from the Sloth and Cyodrake's Gaze plots, respectively

2. Captain RourkexHannah, from the Lost Isle and Hannah and the Ice Caves plots, respectively

3. KanrikxIsca, from the Hannah and the Ice Caves and Curse of Maraqua plot respectively

4. Horace the PoorxPrincess Amira, from the Lost Desert Plot

5. The Spirit of SlumberxGilly, from the Tale of Woe

A zombified duckbill platypus to do my bidding? YES! That's just what I always wanted. My first command to it will be for it to go out and buy me a PSP and Wand of Wishing. XD

Lastly, if you haven't already noticed, I tend to answer things in order as well. So no problem.

Bye!

~AuroraBorealis14

Seriously... That would be totally awesome, but one of the main reasons I don't really like it that much is that it just kind of squicks me to think about, erm, 'later on', if you catch my drift. 8P

I know how you feel about that. When I got Wand of Wishing, it was right before we figured out that something was wrong with the UMD drive, so I went from 8D to D8 in about .15 seconds. Then, after about six months of agonizing about having the game so close and not being able to play it, my bro and I popped it in just to se what would happen, AND IT WORKED! That was kind of mash-up of 8DDDDDDDDDDDDDD (super-charged 8D) and (_ _) (-_-) (_ _) (headdesk). Then, about two weeks later, it got messed up. T-T Just a hint, when you're fighting the Erisim Advisor in the BattleDome, in the Founder's Temple Arena(you'll know what I'm talking about when you get there), whatever you do, don't go look at the tapestries on the wall. I did that, and now my game is messed up so that whenever I fire a bow (the only decent weapons in the game), I have to fire it four or five times to actually shoot one. (_ _) (-_-) (_ _)

It's true, the Aisha's a ho. XD Yep, Capara's going to dump him for Master Vex because he accidentally sneezed on her prize Cheat! deck, but Master Vex is trying to hide his growing addiction to Achyfi, while Galggaroth is trying to convince the Citadel he was NOT having an affair with Kass' spirit preserved in a stuffed Turmac doll, when in fact he secretly is. ^^ I can just see an argument between Linae and Gormos on which is better, a spaceship or a boat:

"If you get stranded in a spaceship, you have a machine that creates food from the particles in the air so you don't have to eat fish, if there's any about, you can travel at mach 24,000, you wouldn't have to worry about vengeful cooks just randomly pushing you off, since they'd have to drag you all the way to the nearest escape hatch, by which time they would have calmed down or someone would have seen you, and a spaceship could BLOW THAT TINY LITTLE PIECE OF CRAP YOU CALL A 'SHIP' TO BITS!!!"

"Well, if you're in a ship and it gets a leak, or you have a mutiny, you can jump ship and try to swim somewhere with at least a small chance of making it, you can get fresh air if you want it, you don't have to worry every five seconds about your engines overheating or something, and you don't have that infernal beeping following you everywhere!"

"... A spaceship has working plumbing."

"...OK, I'm in." ^^

Captain RourkexHannah, hmm? Eeee-nteresting.... -steeples fingers and chuckles evilly- Maybe Kanrik and Isca would meet each other in one of those GarinxHannah fics (which I like most of). :) The HoracexAmira pairing would probably be brought about by a dare, maybe from a meeting between the Scarabs, including Nabile, or maybe not including Nabile, depends really. SSxG, pairing circumstances processing... Ding! An older Gilly is thinking about her adventures as a child, and decides to dig up more about one of the least acknowledged participators of the Restoration, as the Neovians call it: The Spirit of Slumber... Half the fun of coming up with crackpairings is thinking of halfway believable (well, in that universe at least) circumstances that would make it happen. :)

Yeah, the concept of the zombified duckbill platypuses came about when every time I would ask my brother what his favorite animal was, he would always say duckbill platypus. X)

Oh good, that settles any problems about that. (^_^)

-looks back over previoius message- I'm kind of really long-winded... '(^_^)

Yep, that was certainly a long, long 'previoius' message. ;)

'(O_O)

True…what happens then is not really something it pleases me to think about either. :|

I'll make sure to do that, once I obtain the game.

XD Capara becomes suspicious when Master Vex is out late every night, and comes home acting strangely. She confronts him when she finds his stash hidden in the "solitary confinement" cell. She tries to make him go to rehab, but he says no, saying that he doesn't have the time and his dad thinks he's fine, so she leaves him. She falls in love with Gorix when the ship he's stowing away on makes a crash landing on her summer home. They get married in a casino in the depths of Neopia Central by a Chomby and the Fungus Balls impersonator. The marriage lasts 48 hours.

While going out in the middle of the night to get some more Achyfi and forget Capara, Master Vex comes across Galgarroth spending a night out on the town with a suspicious Turmac doll. He threatens him to expose him to the Citadel, but finds out that Galgarroth knows how to get unlimited Achyfi, so they make a deal. But finally, the Turmac doll is ripped apart by Darigan's spoiled Puppyblew, Mr. Cuddlies, destroying Kass's spirit, and leaving Galgarroth heartbroken. However, he finally gets over it and takes up with Jhudora, as he has an affinity for people that are purple. ^_^

JeranxPsellia, I imagine, would happen because she caught him. His gratefulness to her would turn into something more. HeermeedjetxShadow Usul…*thinks* I know! Heermeedjet is sent on a mission to the Haunted Woods, while Meerouladen is going on a different mission. While Heermeedjet is sleeping in a deserted wood, the Shadow Usul slips into his tent and tries to kill him. He wakes up suddenly and she finds that he has a genetic disorder which makes him immune to her magic. They then become partners-in-crime, who become something more. Meerouladen is resentful of all the attention she gets, and feels ignored by his brother. *dun dun dun* …This is fun! XD

Duckbill platypus…well, I can see why he likes them. They're the only egg-laying mammals, which makes them unique. XD

That's okay, I have a habit of writing really long messages too. My friends don't like to talk to me on the internet anymore because my IM's are too long and "hard to read". :)

^_^

-nodnod- Sufficient squick has been known to make even the most devoted fan stand in their shower for three hours straight, scrubbing furiously at their skin and shrieking "UNCLEAN! I FEEL SO UNCLEAN!", to quote TV Tropes and Idioms.

-falls over laughing at GalgarrothxJhudora- Now that would certainly be an interesting situation...

But then, the CFB impersonator is discovered to be a spy, on a quest for Jelly World, and he drags Gorix and Capara along with him, but he is also accompanied by Bonju, who is now stark raving mad after having to watch the complete, entire Star Trek series in a row without even bathroom breaks (ACK, run-on sentence!). Capara decides he is much sexier that way, so she tricks the Impersonator into landing on Kreludor, assisted by Bonju for no good reason, where she puts Gorix into cryo-sleep and then has the cryo-chamber launched into space.

Then, the Impersonator teleports them all back onto the ship and off of Kreludor just before it blows up. The reason for this is that Master Vex decided to get revenge on Capara, by blowing up Kreludor. Of course, he didn't know she was actually going to be on Kreludor, so yeah. The Impersonator pilots the vessel out into space, while Bonju and Capara make out in front of the non-existent sunset, right before they're blown up by the honeymoon ship of Garoo, Ylana, Gormos, Linae, Hoban, Isca, Armin, Kayla, Mammoth, Lady Frostbite, Jeran, Psellia, Heermeedget, the Shadow Usul, Captain Rourke, Hannah, Kanrik, the Spirit of Slumber, Gilly, and Captain Picard (don't ask). ^^

Man, you're way better than me at making up soap opera plot lines... Careful, it might become addictive. Happened to me once, isn't that right Penelope?

-nodnod-

Hey, that's my line!! -commences ranting at Penelope-

That would certainly be a factor, although part of Jeran and Psellia's relationship might just be because they're both hot... XD

FURRY!!!

Shut up Penelope, I'm not a furry, and I'm a homophobe so I'm not a lesbian either. '(-.-) I really, really like the HxSU idea... You should write it sometime! And then, just when Meerouladen is contemplating murdering Heermeedget and the Shadow Usul, he recieves a placation from the author in the form of a horde of fangirls. XD

Tell me about it... Awww, I'm sorry. D= But, you have moi to talk to now (if that's any consolation)! Welp, ah gotta go, so,

Ciao (I know, I use that word too much)!

~Dwarfstar~

*Laughs hysterically at the idea of Bonju gone insane after watching the complete Star Trek* That'll do it, all right. Poor Bonju. And poor Gorix. XD

Dramatic…I wonder who Captain Picard's there with. O_o Suspicious… :D

I think I already am addicted. I need to go to rehab. I'll take Master Vex with me so he can kick his addiction too. Master Vex, you need to go to rehab.

Master Vex: *comes out in Amy Winehouse wig* No, no, no!

Jeran and Psellia are indeed quite hot. :D

I'm glad you like the HxSU story… I will definitely try to write it and put it up.

It's a great consolation. :)

But now I have to go too. So bye!

Yep, it can happen all right. I've started watching it too (TNG, anyway), and I can already feel my mind slipping away... =D

Kanrik, of course! ^^ But, the truth is, Kanrik hired him to pose as his fiancee so he can get on the ship, where he then kidnaps Hoban and Isca, marries Isca, and condemns Hoban to the same fate as Bonju. =) Picard simply jumps through the window and flies back to the Enterprise, where it is discovered that he is, in fact, Superman. Just as Hoban is about to be driven insane, Bonju, Capara, the Impersonator, and Kass' Spirit (which has survived by preserving itself in a ring, carried by a hobbit), appear, free Hoban and Isca, and beat Kanrik to within an inch of his life. They then press-gang him into joining the crew of the Flying Dutchman, where he will slowly mutate into a twisted form of Maraquan Gelert.

Then, Galgarroth and Jhudora show up, acting extremely drunk. It is then discovered that they aren't really drunk, they're simply carrying a virus that causes people to act as if they're drunk. They quickly infect the other crew members, causing choas and wild partying all across the ship. Just as Bonju finally persuades Hoban to stick his finger in an electrical outlet, Picard flies back with Beverly Crusher, who stabs them all with a harpoon, which cures them of the disease, but unfortunately kills them all as well. She and Captain Picard fly off into the middle of nowhere, laughing maniacally. Then, TNT decided that this ending was too violent, so they changed it so that she only stabbed them in the arm with a hypodermic needle, which cures them of the disease without killing them. They rejoin the Honeymooner (except Kanrik, who is still paying off his debt to Davy Jones), and fly off into space to have many more adventures and inflict chaos on the universe. ^^

-looks back over previous paragraph- I said 'fly' way too many times, didn't I? '(^_^)

Ooh, ooh! I wanna come too! 8D -runs into clinic laughing maniacally, and is immediately placed in a strait-jacket-

In the words of.. erm, I don't know, but in the words of whoever-it-was, "Iiiit's twue!"

HOORAY! I can't waaaaaaiiiiiiiiiit!!! -runs around in circles-

That's good to know. ^^

Mm-kay. Bye!

P.S. You know, it occurs to me I've just been acting really hyper for someone who's been sick for the past three days... o.o

But Kanrik, sick of his debt to Davy Jones, buys a credit card and pays it off. XD He is left with a huge credit card bill, which he pays off using all the stolen goods in the Thieves' Guild treasury. Desperate to find his new wife Isca (who is now dating Hoban and trying to get a divorce), he then calls up Commander Valkala and offers him all the stolen goods in the Thieves' Guild treasury to buy one of Sloth's spare ships. Commander Valkala agrees, and Kanrik comes to get his new ship. Just as he is getting ready to leave, Valkala demands payment. Kanrik reveals with an evil laugh that the treasury is empty and makes his escape. However, he doesn't make it very far, as he has no idea to drive a ship. He and the Grundo slaves on board are saved from a fiery death when Grothtraxxa, the chief Grundo slave, takes the wheel. Kanrik lets her drive, and spends his own time poring over maps and looking out the window trying to find the Honeymooner. Sloth is furious when he finds out Valkala gave his best ship with his best Grundos to Kanrik, without even getting any payment for it. He prepares to destroy Valkala with his death ray. Just when he is about to pull the trigger, the Honeymooner crashes into his ship.

He runs off to investigate, leaving a Grundo guard to watch Valkala. Valkala tells the Grundo that if he lets him go, he will give him everything he got for the ship. The guard, not the sharpest tack in the drawer, enthusiastically agrees. Valkala, having pulled a Kanrik, runs off without giving him a dime.

Meanwhile, Kanrik hears the ships crash and decides to go see what happened. He is overjoyed when he sees the Honeymooner. Leaving his ship to the Grundos, he sneaks in, finding Hoban and Isca in a tight embrace. He announces his arrival, and challenges Hoban to a duel for Isca. Hoban accepts and Isca calls for help. Soon, the entire Honeymooner crew arrives. Jeran joins Hoban and Garoo joins Kanrik. Isca is mortified, but she is one of the few--the rest are egging them on. Garin, who has been stowing away in the janitor's closet with Jacques, comes out to comfort her, but finds he is too drawn to the battle. He and Jacques join the side of their fellow thief, Kanrik.

Soon everyone from all three ships involved is taking sides and it becomes a huge battle. But just when the fighting reaches a climax, a stage rises out of the ground. It holds the Chomby Impersonator, with a whole compliment of Fungus Balls behind him. He begins to sing Chomby's signature song (the one where he bobs his head and hollers over and over), the fighting ceases, and they all go to kill the Impersonator/Spy so that he'll shut the heck up. They are united by this, and decide to stop fighting permanently.

Just then, Grothtraxxa enters with news--the ships are repaired. Hoban falls in love with her at first sight, leaving Isca in tears, With his dying breaths, the Chomby Impersonator marries them. He also tells the couple that he is Hoban's father. Kanrik consoles his estranged wife, and they decide not to get a divorce just yet. Meanwhile, Garin gets into a fight with the hobbit over Kass' Spirit in a ring. Garin is about to finish the hobbit when Galgarroth steps in and kicks him in the face for "messing with his man." Hearing this, Kass' Spirit flies into Galgarroth's arms. Because of this, Jhudora dumps Galgarroth and decides to go hit on lonely and resentful Meerouladen. They become an item and go on a double date with Heermeedjet and the Shadow Usul to the other side of the ship.

The happy couples do not notice this, but Sloth turns on them and sneaks back into his ship, preparing to blow up the Honeymooner with his ship's huge rays. Valkala notices this, and tells the helmsman of the Honeymooner to drive away at full speed. He slips into Kanrik's old ship, determined to stop Sloth.

Sloth immediately begins to chase the Honeymooner as they drive away. Valkala goes after him, partially damaging his ship with his lasers. They shoot at each other until both ships are barely still flying and Valkala's lasers are out of power. Sloth's lasers have one large shoot left in them, which he aims at the Honeymooner. The Honeymooner crew braces themselves to die as they hear the laser fire and see the sky turn red with light. However, when the shooting is over, they find themselves alive and their ship suffering minimal damage. Hannah looks out the back window and discovers why--Valkala threw his ship in front of the Honeymooner and sacrificed himself.

The others learn this, and they grieve for their lost savior. Sloth realizes he has just killed his friend, and he grieves too. He starts to cry, and goes over to the Honeymooner to try to make amends. He begs for forgiveness through his tears. They decide to grant it. He becomes part of their family, and they sail off into the stars with a new name for their ship--the Valkala.

*looks over long story she just wrote* That was weird. And long. And mushy. Just like this paragraph is full of sentence fragments.

*AuroraBorealis14, Master Vex, and Dwarfstar sit in a circle with other characters, admitting they are powerless over writing soap opera storylines, Achyfi, and the want to go to rehab* XD

Well that was a long post. But I have to go. Bye! And thanks for the comments on my Rikki-Tikki-Tavi story, they mean a lot!

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAH -is on the floor writhing and laughing hysterically while family looks on worriedly- I can just imagine Galgarroth telling Garin not to interfere with 'his man'... XD Looks like Kanrik (and Valkala) has discovered the hard way the downside of credit cards. =) I'm not sure I want to know exactly what Garin and Jacques were doing in the same janitor's closet... =^+_O^=I feel kind of stupid asking this (as a crackreator I'm supposed to know my characters by heart), but who is Commander Valkala again? '^^

Episode #2: Androids and Zombies and Lolcats, Oh My! (Yes, all that was just the first episode =D)

The Valkala is flying along in the vast reaches of space, and everything is quiet and serene. Suddenly, what starts as a calm discussion between Gormos and Linae over which is better, a ship or a boat, turns into a heated argument. Just as Linae steals Gormos' blaster and is about to blow his head off, the Spirit of Slumber steps in and demands an explanation as to Gilly, Ylana, Armin, Kayla, Mammoth, Lady Frostbite, Psellia, Captain Rourke and his absence over pretty much the entire previous adventure. Linae tells him that it's because they're not considered part of the show, they're just background characters, to which Gormos responds by reminding her that they, too, were only once and briefly mentioned in the first episode. Linae shoots him, and then immediately begins sobbing over his charred body. Jhudora, Meerouladen, Heermeedget and the Shadow Usul (who shall here be named Christine ^^) walk in to see her beating him with a large, floppy, plastic piece of fake pizza and yelling at him to get up because who else is going to nuke their Blumaroo-steak Pizza Rolls to perfection?

Jhudora offers to bring Gormos back to life, to whcih Linae responds by tearfully promising her anything, beating Gormos with her 'Life-Pizza' all the while. Jhudora, distracted, tells her to stop, but Linae explains that it is an obscure tradition in Shenkuu to beat your deceased loved ones with a Life-Pizza, which will supposedly either bring them back to life or kill them. Jhudora smacks Linae unconcious and brings Gormos back to life, however he is now a zombie, and is only able to talk in Lolspeak, the official language of Icanhascheezburger. Linae comes to, shrieks at the horror her fiancee has become, and runs off crying. Once again, Captain Picard comes to the rescue by tossing Q and Lt. Commander Data into the Valkala. He then tells her to choose between them, and Linae picks Data. The two make out in front of the non-existent sunset (courtesy of Bonju and Capara). XD Q and Gormos go and join Sloth's bachelor's club in that dark, lonely corner of the arcade room that the couples the crew is composed of seem so fond of going to. o_O

Ylana and Garoo decide to get married, however there is no Impersonator present to say the words. Sloth reveals that he is an ordained Chomby and the Fungus Balls Impersonator, and marries the two on the spot. this, however, has now caused a rivalry with Kass' Spirit, a renowned Sticks 'N' Stones Imposter, the CFB Impersonators' most dire foes. On his way to Sloth's quarters to assassinate him in his sleep, he sees an approaching vessel, and runs off to warn Kanrik, who is currently posing as captain of the Valkala.

My imagination bank is kind of running dry right now, so I'll leave the cliffhanger to you. (-_-) ---zzz (my imagination) But ACK! Crackpairings! Must... list... need... overwhelming... @~@

1. BonjuxLinae, from the Cyodrake's Gaze plot

2. MasilaxAgent 00 Hog, from Hannah and the Ice Caves and Brucey B. and the Lucky Coin, respectively

3. CaylisxBruno, from the Curse of Maraqua and Tale of Woe plots, respectively

4. ReginaldxLucy, from the Tale of Woe and Darkest Faerie plot and videogame, respectively

5. SophiexSssidney, from Tale of Woe and the Deserted Fairgrounds, respectively

6. TomosxPrincess Vyssa, form the Lost Deserrt and Usurpers of the Crown plots, respectively

Wow, that was harder (and easier) than I thought it'd be... Like I said, mah brain is drained. (*.*)

Hi, my name is Dwarfstar...

Crowd: Hi, Dwarfstar...

And I, well, I'm addicted to rehab. -closes eyes and walks off stage with a dignified air- XD Not much way to help that problem...

Yar weelcome. ^^ It was the least I could do, AND it was great! You're a lot better at retelling events than me... -looks back at Huh? and cringes- I must spread the word! 8D

Later that evening...

"At around 7:30 P.M. this afternoon, a raving early-teens girl with glasses who has been identified as Dwarfstar has been arrested for running stark naked into the middle of a courtroom in session and shrieking something about 'Rikki-Tikki-Tavi from Rikki's Point of View'. Officials say she will soon be released into the Nutter Butters Memorial Hospital For the Mentally Unstable, where she will be kept under constant surveillance. She poses no threat to the surrounding neighborhood, however civilians are advised to keep earplugs/loud music close out hand to drown out the horrible strains of 'Ugly Girl' from down the street. Back to you, Jacie."

I do get excited about these things. =D

Gah! Sorry it's been so long since I posted. I've been sick, and busy.

Kanrik quickly canceled his credit card when he found out one of his thieves had been using it to complete his project of buying every single Usuki playset in Neopia. And who can say what Garin and Jacques were doing in there? O_o ;) Commander Valkala is that green Ixi from the Return of Sloth. I hardly know who he is either. XD

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD *imagines Linae beating Gormos with her "Life-Pizza" and sobbing about pizza rolls* Priceless! *shakes with laughter at the idea of a "Sticks-'N'-Stones Imposter"*

Episode #2 continued:

Kanrik is lying awake in his bed in the captain's quarters of the Valkala (Yes, I finally figured out how to italicize!) when he sees his door open, with no visible person behind it. He knows exactly who it is--he and everyone else are slowly adjusting to living with someone's spirit stored in a ring. Careful not to wake Isca (who is snoring so loudly that it would be unlikely she would hear him get up anyway), he sneaks out of bed to talk with Kass. Kass informs him of the oncoming ship, and they go to find Grothtraxxa so she can work the controls. However, she and her new husband Hoban seem to be…otherwise occupied. So they go to the cockpit themselves. On the radar, Kanrik finds that there is indeed a ship headed right towards them. He gets the speaker out to make the announcement to the ship, but it isn't necessary, as a booming crash wakes the entire crew up anyway.

Kanrik (wih Kass' Spirit Ring slid onto his finger), runs over to the window to see what just happened, and sees the ship that was approaching. Its name is:

The SpaceRevenge.

"The SPACEREVENGE?!?!?!" they hear Garin exclaim from a nearby room. "Man, don't I ever get a freaking break?"

It seems not. First to come onto the Valkala is Scarblade, both swords out. He is extremely pleased with himself that he is now a space pirate as well as a regular pirate. Behind him come his crew. He demands that the people on the Valkala, who are all slowly coming toward the cockpit to check out the action, hand over all their valuables. Kanrik refuses to do this, so Scarblade agrees to another deal--instead, they will fight to the death for position of captain of the ship.

This time, the crews watch nervously as Kanrik and Scarblade battle it out. Meanwhile, Ylana calls up her fellow mercenary Sophix, and, wanting to play a trick on her, tells her that there's a guy on the ship that she'd probably love.

The fight rages on, and Kanrik is losing badly. Soon, he is laying on the floor, with his sword thrown aside, almost defeated. He begs the nearby Gormos to throw him his sword, but all zombie Gormos can say is, "I CAN HAS DAGGER NOW?!?!?! O RLY? KTHXBAI!!11!eleventyone!" Just as Scarblade is about to kill Kanrik in front of a terrified crew, Sophix bursts onto the ship. "LYK OMG UR SO HOTT!" she screams at Scarblade, running toward him. However, she runs a little too fast, and accidentally shoves Scarblade off the ship, causing him to fall to his death. His devoted and extremely stupid crew, determined to follow him wherever he may go, run after him and they fall too.

Sophix is honored as a hero, but she is still mildly upset that she killed "that hot guy". This only lasts, however, until she meets Gormos, and they quickly fall in love when they find that they both speak Lolspeak. From then on, they spend their time together, whispering sweet YA RLYs into each other's ears. Kanrik hears screaming from his room, and realizes that he hasn't seen Isca all night. She never woke up because she never heard the noises, due to the fact she was snoring so loudly. Concerned, he runs to her side. When she finally calms down, she tells him she had one of her special dreams. A scary one.

And that was when Kanrik realized that Kass' Spirit Ring was missing from his finger…

I shall leave this cliffy up to you…MWAHAHA.

I shall also think up some more pairings:

1. TorxLilian, from The Darkest Faerie and the Lost Isle plot, respectively

2. King KelpbeardxEdna the Witch, from Curse of Maraqua and wherever she appears on the site, respectively

3. DariganxMasila, from the Meridell and Hannah and the Ice Caves plots, respectively

4. Captain TuanxHannah, from the Cyodrake's Gaze and Hannah and the Ice Caves plots, respectively

5. GillyxMorris, from the Tale of Woe and Meridell plots, respectively

6. King HaganxFyora, from wherever they appear on they site

Aww, thanks…

"The next morning, another raving early-teens girl with glasses, identified as AuroraBorealis14, ran through the streets screaming about something called 'Neopets crackpairings', while pelting everyone in sight with Baby Kougra Plushies and caramel chocolate bars. Jeez, we ought to do something about these early-teens girls with glasses, eh, Jacie?"

And I bid you goodbye until the next post! *bows*

~AuroraBorealis14

Oh man, I am so so so sorry about taking so long to reply! Dang server took a loooooong time to send me an e-mail about it, and then I got on here, and I looked at the date, and I was like 'HOLY CRAP!!!!' I'm really sorry about that... Aw, I'm sorry; being sick is no fun, I know. D=

What about that time you got a fever and you were awake all night laughing hysterically and yelling 'BURN BABY BURN!!'?

'O_O

-falls over laughing at Kanrik's discovery- XD I remember when I was going to try and collect all the Usuki stuff for real, but I was too lazy. =D A-HA! I just KNEW I remembered him from somewhere... Yep, he's the one who gets beat up by Garoo in those panels in Chapter Ten that I like to look at over and over... -drools over Garoo, not noticing when Penelope throws a rock at my head- 8D

-is unable to breathe laughing- Yep, it's what we knew all along... ISCA SNORES. XD Yep, G and H got an occupation they like, lucky punks. XP

"The SpaceRevenge?!?!?!" they hear Garin exclaim from a nearby room. "Man, don't I ever get a freaking break?" XD

"I CAN HAS DAGGER NOW?!?!?! O RLY? KTHXBAI!!11!eleventyone!" ROFLMHO!! XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD It's true, sweet YA RLYs are quite fun to whisper. ^^

Episode #2, Part 3:

As Kanrik stares at his finger, getting the odd feeling that his life is being controlled by some berserk, insane force, Bonju bursts into the room, yelling and flailing his arms, and knocking over and breaking a bunch of priceless keepsakes as Kanrik stares. Finally, Kanrik asks him what the heck he's doing. Bonju calms down immediately and tells him that Sloth and Q want to see him. As soon as he walks out of the room, Bonju continues running and screaming, until Isca finally gets annoyed and shoots him before calmly rolling over and going back to sleep.

Kanrik meets the two in the arcade room (after, of course, shooing Gormos and Sophix with the admonition to 'get a room!'). When he asks them what they want, Q and Sloth look around to see if the arcade room is empty before knocking him unconscious by means of one of Jeran's dirty socks shoved into his face. XD The camera turns to show Kass's Spirit smacking himself against the side of a transparent cookie jar.

Gothtraxxa and Hoban emerge into the hallway outside their quarters and run smack-dab into Capara, who is looking for Bonju. When they stare at her for a moment and then start making out, she gives them the O_o look and hurries on.

In the mess hall, Gilly, the Spirit of Slumber, the Shadow Usul, Heermeedget, Meerouladen, Jhudora, Galgarroth, Mammoth, and Lady Frostbite are playing Call of Duty 4 Online when Bonju strolls in, apparently completely oblivious to the fact that he has a bleeding, gaping lazer-hole in his stomach, and asks if he can play. He accidentally throws Mammoth off his playing, which gets him killed, which makes him lose his Airstrike, Air Recon, and For-the-love-of-Pete-don't-ever-turn-anything-up-this-high-level Machine Gun, which prompts him to punch Bonju through the wall, which opens a portal which sucks them all into another dimension....

CLIFFY!! Which I am leaving to you. =D

Guess what? My cousin got married yesterday. I'm really happy for her, but it's kinda sad because her husband is from either Britain or Australia (I know he lived in Australia at one point, but I'm not sure where he's from), so we'll only be able to see them when they can come down here. =( But hey, as long as they're happy!

You know, I just got a cool idea for a picture. It's a picture of somebody (or possibly multiple somebodies) holding marionette strings, except instead of the weird crosspeice thing it's a pen, and as it goes toward the bottom of the picture it kind of fades down looking weird and stormy to looking like a street, and the strings are all attached to the people and stuff, even though they look real; it's called 'Master(s) of Fate'. The idea's probably been done to death, but I still like it anyway. I may draw it sometime soon, and put it up on DeviantArt, depending on how lazy I am for the next however-long. My username on there is Deathofsues, so it'll show up there if I draw it.

You're welcome! ^^

Hooray, the word has been spread! =D It's really funny, 'cause my brother has this theory that there is a place that draws all the crazy and weird people to it. He calls the force that does it 'Insaniferous Ether'. XD

Oh, yes, Jacie, you should definitely watch your back... -smiles evilly as I begin training roaches and rats to attack anyone I don't like (which isn't all that easy when you're securely wrapped up in a straitjacket). =)

Bye bye bye! -bows also-

Ciao,

~Dwarfstar~

forgive me for the guy-on-guy, but a crack pairing ive always wanted to see id TorXJeran. and Kanrik-Armin. and HaganXSkarrl. maybe. and perhaps FyoraXUnknown, mysteriously revealed boy faerie. YAY FAERIE KING! they should totally have one.

Hehe, don't worry, I'll probably just squirm and die a little; and chances are, with me and my brother's collective sick minds, that probably would have happened sooner or later today. ^^

-ponders TorxJeran- So THAT'S what Tor does when he 'takes a walk' in the castle courtyard... XD Roberta doesn't mind, though, contrary to the theories of many TxR shippers, because let's just say that there's a reason the far left corner of the Brightvale Library is officially marked off on Tuesdays... :)

-ponders KanrikxArmin- Hannah's going to have a cow when she sees that... D8

Erm, I think Hagan and Skarl are actually brothers... :/

Seriously, that would be frickin' awesome! NEO-BISHIES FOR ALL!! XD Of course, we all know the reason that there are no boy faeries (a situation which sucks and should be remedied).

-rolls eyes- Oh boy, here she goes again...

THEY WENT MAD FROM THE TAINT ON SAIDIN! THEY DESTROYED MARAQUA AND BROKE THE WORL-- -brick'd-

-sigh- Sorry about that, she's been reading too much Wheel of Time again...

-regains consciousness- Owwwwwww........ Anyway, thanks for posting! We really need more crackreators. I'm really starting tomiss AuroraBorealis14... D:

Ciao, and welcome to the Crackworld! ^_^

~Dwarfstar~

Hi everyone! It's fabulous to see another crackreator. Welcome to our board of silly pairings, kattastic999!

I'm posting to say I'm SO SORRY I haven't been on for forever!!! I'm still alive, but my internet connection has been disabled until today. Part four will be up really soon!

I'd like to see TorxJeran too, XDDD

KanrikXArmin...*ponders Hannah's face when she finds out and falls on the floor laughing*

Hannah: WHAT THE HECK!!!! Kanrik and Armin are together? Who can people pair me with now?

Crackreators: Eeeexcellent... *approach with devious smiles*

Hagan and Skarl are brothers. I'm not one for incest, really, but it might be an interesting read if it was well done.

We do need boy faeries...

How about these pairings:

JeranxAmira

SkarlxVyssa

RobertaxGalem

KassxKanrik slash

Roxton Colchester IIIxGarin slash

I've got to go now, but I will post again, hopefully tomorrow!

~AuroraBorealis14

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -glomps-

That's OK; if it had been me, my excuse would probably have been that I was just too darn lazy... XD

The word, it spreads! 8D -steeples fingers- Eeexcellent.....

I wonder what Lisha would say if she saw that... o_O

Hm, you know, it really would. I probably wouldn't be able to write it very well, though, in part because I'm not too good with romance, but mainly because of the slash/incest (if my second oldest brother [the one who tolerates inappropriateness and is just about my best friend] found out, I'd never hear the end of it, but if my oldest brother [the nosy obnoxious pest who appears for the most part to be nature's way of making up the balance] found out, I'd be in a crapload of trouble... and because it squicks me out 8P).

Oh Hannah, you have my sympathy. XD

-tapes giant cardboard signs all over body and runs around screaming 'WHAT DO WE WANT? BOY FAERIES!! WHEN DO WE WANT 'EM? YESTERDAY!!!'-

Hmmm, Jeran and Amira would be pretty cool....

SkarlxVyssa?... I guess there's no accounting for taste. XD

Wow. Odd as it is, I really, really like that pairing. Poor Grayson. ^^

Hehe, whenever I think of Kass, I think of SpiritRing!Kass, which makes for some oddities... XDDDDD

At the news of Roxton and Garin, Lillian decides that this is the last straw. She rallies together Grayson, Hannah, Kayla, Horace, Psellia, and... Hagan? They then begin their plot to break the couples up... Omigosh! Soap Opera B-Plot! 8O

We should totally start giving each other crackpairing challenges (no slash or incest, of course)... 8DDD

Anyhoo, I gotta go now. Toodles, and welcome back, AuroraBorealis14!

Ciao,

~Dwarfstar~

I am now back with the next part of the story! This post is in reply to the last story-related post. And again, I'm SO sorry I haven't been around.

XD Of course…I would never do that… *shifty eyes* *inches away*

Me too. XD *drools along with you, and puts rock-proof head shields on both of us* OMG THX! Episode #2, Part 4: Grothtraxxa (after Bonju and Capara manage to drag her away from Hoban with the jaws of life) confirms that the ship is indeed in a different dimension…an alternate universe. She sends Hannah to find Kanrik. After much searching, Hannah finds him, but he is locked inside a humongous cage, right next to the jar holding Kass's Spirit. He seems to be unconscious, and Hannah can find no method of waking him up. The only thing she can guess is that they've got him under some magic sleeping spell. However, she manages to free Kass's Spirit quite easily, and puts him on her finger. She runs to inform the others of Kanrik's whereabouts, but the entire crew seems to be fixated on a fuzzy message coming in on the radio. Ylana tells her that they are trying to contact a neighboring ship they've found. Soon, they hear a very familiar voice.

"That's Kanrik's voice!" Hannah exclaims.

This Kanrik confirms, confused, that he is Kanrik, to the extreme confusion of the crew. Grothtraxxa explains their situation: as they are in an alternate dimension, they are going to find alternate versions of themselves, somehow different from the selves they know.

Alternate-Kanrik beams them all on to his ship. (Other than the "real" Kanrik, of course, who is still trapped.) However, they find themselves unable to find any visible differences in the Alternate-Crew. They seem very nice, and invite the Real-Crew to stay for the night. This is when they start to see differences...

"What is it?" Hannah asks Jhudora confusedly, who is staring at the different people walking by. Alt-Isca is pining after Alt-Garin, who obliviously stands talking with Alt-Jacques. Alt-Armin is gazing adoringly at Alt-Hannah, who is holding hands with Alt-Kanrik, while Alt-Masila growls with anger at the same scene. Alt-Nabile and Alt-Jazan are in an embrace, while an upset Alt-Tomos looks on.

"I think I've found the difference. Hannah, we're in a canon pairing universe..."

DUN DUN DUUUNNN! Cliffy...

Belated congrats to your cousin! Tell her a random girl you met on the internet is happy for her. XD JK

That's a cool idea for a picture! *ponders image* I like it! I'll be looking forward to seeing it.

Insaniferous Ether...if it existed, I'd probably be drawn toward it like that. *snaps fingers for effect* Your brother sounds like a really fun person!

Again, I'm sorry I've taken forever to get this up. Not only was there the internet connection problem, but I've had very little time to myself. You see, I'm applying to an arts school, so I've been practicing my trumpet 24/7 to get good enough. When I'm not doing schoolwork, that is...I haven't written anything that wasn't a school paper in weeks. I'll stop talking about it now.

Bye for now!

~AuroraBorealis14

HEY, LOOK, A DEAD FORUM! :U

My non-canon(could be considered crack) pairing is....

The Darkest Faerie/King Altador

From the NTDF video game, of course.

YES, I ACTUALLY SUPPORT THIS ONE. :D

-shot-

Erm... Don't ask?

Yeah, I'm going to write a fanfiction for that one... Eventually...

I would like a Neopets & Tokyo Mew Mew crossover. :D

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